something extrordanary happened on my drive home from school earlier tonight. i was thinking about someone and how depressed they make me as i drove up onto the I-84 bridge. as feet of pavment flew beneath me i saw only the horizon as it rose in front of me. i saw the moon rise above the concrete barrier large as the sky itself. surrounded and nurtured in a blanket of grey clouds i witnessed the man in the moon weeping. his face reflected the own anguish i feel over a life never meant to be. i noticed one of my all time favorite songs was playing; a never-fail beauty of symphonic indie. as i watched my own soul 3.8 quadrillion ångströms away, the city spread out below. twenty miles of suburbs twinkled in front of me. as the bridge crested it began to curve, drawing my sight away from the suburbs. slower then time and at seventy miles per hour my city swirled around me. skyscarpers stood tall as millions the millions of people surrounding me ceased to exist. it was love and beauty in its purest form, me taking my city in. everything that had been weighing on my mind in recent weeks and hours and seconds vanished. almost brought this cold hearted bitch to tears.

I cannot sleep. So I shall spill all the thoughts in my head that are keeping me up. In a much watered down version so no one actually knows what I’m talking about. A little self loathing mixed with self pity mixed with other-people loathing and wrapped up with a nice ‘this is how it is so I better fix what I can and get the fuck over the rest.’

January was the shitty month. Its end was supposed to signify then end of shittiness in my world. February was the fresh start, back to my wonderful life. I love my life. I fucking rock. Like bahgawk. But this did not go as planned. February has sucked some ass. So apparently I cannot signal the end of shit with a date, I just need to quit being a whining fucking pussy and get over it. I’m so losing my train of thought and not into this anymore. I’m done bitching.

So anyways, I had an ok weekend. I worked the Lombard store for a while and it was awesome. They don’t put up with any shit over there, its such a nice change. Then I go back to my store and its back to the same old crap. I love it but shit, we take entirely too much crap. I got smashed last night and stayed up til it was 7:30 in the morning. Then I got up today and got drunk watching the game with some friends. It was great. I love those guys. I have a game for you guys, post your answers in the comments. Guess what I discovered we sell in the pharmacy this week? Past discoveries include but are not limited to; bladder infection test kits, menopause test kits, generic lubricant, infertility test kits (for men). And a hint, this is not a kit, rather it is a umm…how do I put this. Fuck you just guess. It’s a thing.

This was kind of a lame post. Sorry guys. I had a shitload to say and I just got bored and didn’t finish.